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2. Stand up your man

What it is: A manual wake-up call for him

How to do it: Men love to be stroked, fondled and handled with authority by expert female hands — and they love watching a woman take manual erotic control of them. If he’s having trouble getting a firm erection, rub a small amount of oil or lubricant onto your palms and put one hand firmly around the base of his penis. Work the other hand from the base up to the head in a circular, twisting motion, as if you were following a winding staircase up his appendage. Caress the head with your palm. Then start at the bottom again. This staircase goes only one way: up.

If he’s sensitive around his perineum (the space between his testicles and anus), adjust the hand gripping the base of his penis so you’re free to massage the perineum with a finger or your thumb. Or pay attention to his testicles if he likes that. When he has a full and firm erection, guarantee his stamina by using this stroke: Open your hand and form a V with your thumb and index finger. Slide his penis between the V so the flat of your palm caresses the shaft, and move upward from the base to the head. Again, only move up.

What couples say:
“The women I knew before I met my wife held me the way a wimpy guy shakes hands. You don’t want that. You don’t want a crusher, either. Tessa has the perfect touch; I let her take charge. When she starts that little twisting move with her hand, I spring to life.”
–Michael, 37

“If you really like something, you’re probably good at it. And I love knowing I can get him really aroused simply by using my hands.”
–Tessa, 30, his wife

“The upward strokes really work. There’s probably a psychological component to it: It’s like she’s pulling my sexual energy upward too.”
–James, 40

“I love being with James. Younger men can get erections so quickly that a woman doesn’t have the opportunity to apply much manual skill. I’m a visual woman, so I get aroused doing this too.”
–Deborah, 29, his wife

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